Who Would You Like to Meet?

I saw this question on one of those dopey surveys a few months ago and I've been thinking about it ever since: Who would you like to meet, anyone, dead or alive?

There's a list of heroes and influences elsewhere on my blog, but I hate to be repetitive, so I figured I'd come up with someone new. Since my mind is very orderly and linear, I followed a systematic approach and asked some people who THEY would want to meet. Mostly people looked at me funny and kept on walking. But I got a few suggestions from people - none of them were right for me:

George Washington? No thanks.

Albert Einstein? He might be cool to meet, but I don't think it would be a very interesting conversation.

Adolf Hitler? Many people want to meet him and see if they could kill him. No dice. For starters, that would screw up the space-time continuum. But more importantly, he's not someone that I WANT to meet, and this is about people I want to meet. If I did meet him, it would be more of a duty or an obligation (to kill him).

John Lennon? Most accounts are pretty clear on the fact that John Lennon was an asshole. Of course, he himself often said he was an asshole, so he was probably right.

Jesus Christ? Nope. If I met Jesus, it would be just so I could tell my friends that I hung out with Jesus. A few problems with this. Jesus obviously didn't speak English. How would we communicate - charades? Poor guy had nails in his hands. Plus, this particular choice of meeting anyone, dead or alive, doesn't apply to fictional characters. If it did, I'd have to start considering Philip Marlowe, Legolas from Lord of the Rings, Tintin, any of the A-Team, Minnie Mouse, etc. Better to limit it to real people.

So without other people's suggestions, and without reusing my heroes, I was stuck with people I respect, but who might not speak my language. I respect John Brown more than anyone who ever lived in the 19th century, but by most contemporary accounts, he was batshit insane. I don't have any dead relatives that I feel like digging up (metaphorically).

After running around in circles and getting nowhere, I decided that after considering all these long-dead people, the person I would most like to meet is currently alive [note: he was alive when I wrote this], and that is Michael Jackson. Am I a fan of his music? No, not particularly. But to sit down in my living room with some coffee, and maybe some biscotti (I am a good host, after all) and Michael Jackson ... I bet that would be really interesting. So I'd like to meet Michael Jackson, because I bet he has some awesome stories, but he's all kooky too, so I'd have to come prepared with a lot of questions.

But I think that would be really cool.